The moment I knew: ‘I pledged I would go to mass for 30 days to understand what I was feeling’

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The moment I knew: ‘I pledged I would go to mass for 30 days to understand what I was feeling’
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After years of friendship, Josie still wasn’t sure whether she was into Chris. So she struck a deal with God

‘Our whole relationship has been a lesson in patience’: Josie and Chris on vacationwas 18 when I first met Chris at a church youth group. Although we came from the same ethno-religious group, Chris wasn’t strictly religious. For him, youth group was a way to socialise with people from our community.

Over the next few years, we hung out together in group situations and when we volunteered. He asked me out twice and I said no. We went through a lot of attempts by our friends to set us up. It was not stalky behaviour, but he tried really hard – always trying to invite me out, always offering to drive me when we went out as a group. But I was a little nervous because in my culture, dating has to lead towards marriage and that seemed really intimidating.

I turned to my faith. I pledged that I would go to mass every day for 30 days to try to understand what I was feeling, and I did a novena to Saint Anthony, who is considered a miracle worker and the patron saint of lost things. On the last day of my mass commitment, Chris turned up somewhere when I was with my cousin Anthony. On the last day of my novena, he texted me to meet up.

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