Abstaining from alcohol is increasingly being destigmatized as more of us consider a booze-free holiday
t first, ankle deep, then wading deeper and deeper, a surge of waves crashed into my thighs as I braced against the tidal tug. My friends were on the beach, unfurling towels and applying sunscreen. I had no time for those chores. I wanted the ocean.
Very few topics of conversation are off-limits among my friends and alcohol was no exception. It was a part of the pre-trip planning conversation, mixed into group text messages about coordinating flights and booking the hotel. My friends knew that I was no longer drinking, and Claire called me from the Dominican Republic, where she was now living with her family, to gauge my comfort level with staying at an all-inclusive resort and the readily available supply of alcohol.
Getting sober was an act of dissent for me as well, but with unintended consequences. When I decided to stop drinking, I felt like my identity was no longer stable. This isn’t an uncommon response; Davis-Timms says that “sobriety becomes an identity shift.” Reassessing my life without alcohol went deeper than what I drank – it shot straight to my inner core.The aspects of your personality that make you uncomfortable or incite pain don’t simply disappear once you eliminate drinking.
Those who choose to eschew drinking are helped by a new flood of alcohol-free beverages in grocery stores and mocktails on bar menus, which is what journalist and editor Julia Bainbridge covers. Her book, is a recipe collection celebrating innovation in non-alcoholic beverages. This lack of distinction is what makes me a bit concerned whenever I read a glossy magazine boasting a headline such as “” Trends generate much-needed conversation but also flatten nuance, and alcohol use disorder requires a comprehensive understanding and approach.
Although I’ve made it an entire year sober, I still feel uneasy around alcohol-like substitutes. Part of recovery’s difficult but redeeming work is understanding my boundaries, which were all too fluid and porous when I drank.
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