ASK ELLIE: University student needs specific help | SaltWire

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ASK ELLIE: University student needs specific help | SaltWire
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Feedback regarding the university student whose friend is extremely anxious (Oct. 7): I read your column daily. I find your responses helpful in helping me ...

Ellie Tesher and Lisi Tesher are advice columnists for the Star and are based in Toronto.Feedback regarding the university student whose friend is extremely anxious :

When someone is suffering with mental illness, it is not rational. The sufferer’s ability to think rationally is hindered or non-existent. Using rational thought is not helpful and in fact can be very hurtful because it often results in the suffering person feeling like they are even more broken. Once someone feels heard, once a person can actually sit with and tolerate a loved one’s pain for even a few minutes, the beneficial results are immediate and can be transformational.

We tried a compromise of going to bed with the window closed, and when she wakes up in the middle of the night she opens the window. But the noises outside wake me and then I can’t get back to sleep, so I’m exhausted.

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