Dear Amy: My mother\u002Din\u002Dlaw is causing a rift in the family that\u0027s hurting my husband.
We haven’t been married long, and his divorce was a contentious one. His ex managed to delay every step of the divorce, and went after everything she could, including the house, which he ended up leaving to her just to bring the proceedings to an end.Sign up to receive daily headline news from the Calgary SUN, a division of Postmedia Network Inc.By clicking on the sign up button you consent to receive the above newsletter from Postmedia Network Inc.
Ongoing contact with your husband’s ex makes you uncomfortable, but you can’t insist that it stop. Unless your mother-in-law is inviting the ex to family events, forcing her into proximity with you and your husband, you really have no say in how she chooses to conduct this relationship. She’ll say things like, “I like my wine, but I’m not an alcoholic like “Shelley,” or, “Shelley drinks too much and gets argumentative” .Article contentI know we are all, including myself, guilty of not seeing ourselves as we really are.
The way to bring this up is to be respectful, concerned, frank, and fair: “I know that ‘Shelley’s’ drinking bothers you, but I have to be honest and say that your drinking worries me.”Article content
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